Friday Watch Party: A Christmas Melody

When it comes to people who have tried to make a career out of Christmas media, it's hard to top Ms. Mariah Carey and/or Ms. Lacey Chabert.  Way, way back in 2015, this power duo teamed up for a single Hallmark movie.  Hold onto your hats, because this one was also directed by Mariah Carey.  I'm pretty sure its about a kids' singing competition or concert or some nonsense. 

Anyway, this combo is like loading your 5 lb. bag of Christmas with like 100 lbs. of Christmas, and we're gonna do it, and we're gonna like it.  No, I have not seen the full movie, just parts of it, which seems impossible.  

We're gonna Holiday the @#$% out of this %$#@.

Day:  Friday - 12/09/2022

Time:  8:30 Central, 6:30 Pacific

Service:  Amazon Streaming

Cost:  $3-$4

All I Want For Christmas is Youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

Happy Birthday, Teri Hatcher

Happy Birthday to actor Teri Hatcher, who is generally just a fantastic idea, but also a vital part of the Legion of Lois Lanes.  She is therefore of special note to this internet website which sometimes talks about Superman media.  

Here's hoping she has a great b-day doing whatever a Teri Hatcher does.

 

Christmas Watch: Christmas in Connecticut (1945)

Watched:  12/08/2022

Format:  HBOmax

Viewing:  Unknown

Director:  Peter Godfrey

One of these days we'll podcast this one, but I've already discussed it before.  2015, 2020

Looking at those previous posts, it's remarkable how much the movie has grown on me, and I clearly forgot to write it up at least one other time.  

Anyway, this is how I will end every Christmas from now on.

Doc Watch: Santa Camp (2022)

Watched:  12/3/2022

Format:  HBOmax

Viewing:  First

Director:  Nick Sweeney

The basic concept for Santa Camp (2022) contains all the volatility you'd expect of a movie that decides to use the familiar cultural touchstone of Santa Claus and the people who play him in malls, parades, personal appearances, etc...  to explore modern social wars and challenges of diversity and inclusivity.  

The movie clearly has a POV, but it's also one that is never stated directly by the filmmakers - this is a doc that lets people be themselves for good or ill on camera.  So, it lives in editorial choices.  Who knows what was left on the cutting room floor?  Maybe some stuff was worse?  Maybe items that were innocuous are cherry picked for context?  But when you're letting Proud Boys speak for themselves, it's hard to say how much nuance you're losing.  

Opening with a meeting of a grand council of Santa's of New England, a role and career choice for aging white men who have a very certain look, we get an idea of who has been a Santa - who embodies jolly ol' St. Nick in our physical space rather than paintings and cartoons.  To my surprise, this group of very similar older guys have already decided that maybe Santa needs more options for the public than just older, white, paunchy men, and they're in agreement that they need to start diversifying by inviting new recruits to their annual weekend retreat known as "Santa Camp".  

PODCAST 223: "The Nine Kittens Of Christmas" (2021) - a Hallmark Holiday PodCast w/ Maxwell and Ryan

Watched:  12/2/2022

Format:  Hallmark Channel 

Viewing:  Second

Decade:  2020's

Director:  David Winning

For more ways to listen

Maxwell and Ryan explore the concept of Hallmark Christmas movies via a single entry. How does it reflect the formula? How does it differ? What is the formula and why? And why so many cats? So think hard about your unshakeable Christmas traditions, grab a cup of cocoa and warm up in the cheery glow of a podcast that is alight with Christmas cheer.

SoundCloud 

The Signal Watch PodCast · 223: "The Nine Kittens Of Christmas" (2021) - a Hallmark Holiday PodCast w/ Maxwell and Ryan

YouTube

Music:

Jingle Bells - Jingle Cats

White Christmas - Jingle Cats

Links:

SNL - Holiday Matchmaking

Cinema Therapy

Holidays 2022

The Signal Watch PodCast · Holidays 2022

Holiday Watch: A Very Harold and Kumar 3D Christmas (2011)

Watched:  11/30/2022

Format:  HBOmax

Viewing:  Second

Director:  Todd Strauss-Schulson

Look, I'd seen this once back in 2012 and that was it for me, but Jamie is currently dealing with COVID, and so we're not looking for movies that are downers or super complicated at the moment.  

And so it was that after approximately 45 seconds of looking, I tuned into A Very Harold and Kumar Christmas (2011) - a movie that a mere 11 years later could never be made.  It's still relatively funny, but I'm also far older than I was when the first Harold and Kumar movie hit in 2004.  So, you kind of have to put yourself into the mental state of the early 00's and then the shift to adulthood that this final installment reflects.  

But, yeah, its maybe the last gasp of a string of movies featuring dudes behaving badly for yuks and a pre-#MeToo worldview that impacts a lot of key punchlines.  Also:  baby doing drugs (this absolutely does not hold up).  And, of course, the charm of a stoner comedy doesn't necessarily hold up over time for reasons so complicated and out of the scope of this blog that I don't feel like getting into it - but I'll say "aside from their musical selections, stoners are mostly deeply boring and tedious IRL."

As left and right horseshoed into overlapping end-states driven by differing concerns, the movie landscape has become a very different and more...  concerned place, in a way not really seen since the early 1960's.  It's not that you can't make a movie like this - no one is stopping you, but it's often not seen as something for a general audience or theatrical release.  Stuff like this now feels like it's a Netflix or Hulu drop.  

It is also super weird that Kumar had spent a couple years in the White House and filmed this during a sabbatical.  

Hallmark Watch: A Holiday Spectacular (2022)

Watched:  11/27/2022

Format:  Hallmark Channel

Viewing:  First

Director:  John Putch

It's easy to forget that before they had a cable channel and the need to fill programming 24/7, Hallmark started making movies for network television.  Back in the day, Hallmark used to deliver semi-prestige Sunday-night movies with name talent.  I don't think this happens anymore as they've moved these movies to The Hallmark Channel and the budgets have taken a hit of sorts, but the DNA of those "Hallmark Presents" movies still exists.  So, every Christmas, tucked amongst the usual low-budget fare of the Hallmark movie season, you do get a movie or three with name actors or big set pieces. 

One of this year's offerings is A Holiday Spectacular (2022), which has only two name actors, one of whom is Eve Plumb, which blew my mind, and Ann-Margret.  Ann-Margret mostly only appears in a framing sequence and probably knocked her part out in 2-3 days of shooting, but it's still a delight to see her.  

Santor Watch: The Key To Christmas (2020)

Approx. 100x more effort was put into this poster than the movie

Watched:  11/27/2022

Format:  Amazon Watch Party

Viewing:  First

Director, Writer, Camera, Editor, Catering, Accountant, Set Decoration:  Jason Mills

Some pals seem to take exception to my practice of watching bad movies, riffing them, commenting upon them, etc...  The argument goes "someone tried, and it's not cool to make fun of them for trying".  To that I say:  if trying is your criteria, I welcome you to watch The Key to Christmas (2020).  Because that @#$% ain't happening here.

Look, I don't understand the market for ultra-cheap holiday movies.  There can't be that many Me and Doug's out there constantly looking for ways to torture each other with the worst in absolute garbage media.  Someone is out there buying the rights to these movies to distribute them with the idea that enough people will watch them that these movies will make money somehow.  I don't get the model.  I have to assume it's money laundering, tax fraud or something.  

Holiday Watch: Spirited (2022)

Watched:  11/26/2022

Format:  Apple+

Viewing:  First

Director:  Sean Anders

So, at our house, there are two very different stances on Dickens' A Christmas Carol.  To me, the book is a near-religious text and an annual reminder that one can make good on a life ill-lived, that every year is a chance for change and a reminder of how we can improve the lot of those around us.  We are a product of our lives, but at the end of the day, it's the choices we make daily that define how we impact the world.  To Jamie, it's this thing that's on at Christmas that people keep remaking as movies of varying quality.  I think both of these viewpoints are true.  

I'll need to give it another viewing, but it's possible Spirited (2022) will enter the very nichey canon of my favorite adaptations of the story, which include the George C. Scott version, the Patrick Stewart version, Muppets Christmas Carol and Scrooged.  Given the way this year's Thanksgiving has gone down, I may just be raw and in need of a boost that this movie provided, but here we are.

While I'm more than done with movies investigating the mechanics behind Santa's operations (Fred Clause and Arthur Christmas are maybe my highlight of that genre), no one had really taken on the same idea with A Christmas Carol.  And if I'm being honest with myself, I don't know if I'd put any thought into it other than it's a ghost story and this is how they work.

PodCast 222: "Home Alone 1 & 2" (1990, 1992) - Holidays 2022 w/ SimonUK and Ryan

 

Watched:  11/05 and 11/12/2022

Format:  Disney+

Viewing: Second/ First

Decade:  1990's

Director:  Christopher Columbus

For more ways to listen

Simon and Ryan ponder two of the biggest money makers of the 1990's, a pair of movies that caught the world by surprise and took cartoon violence, family strife, abandonment, and hanging with old people and found their Christmas box office miracle. As the movies are now staples of the Holiday, we take a look to see what's under the tree. Will we get a sweet present or hit in the face with a @#$%ing bowling ball?