Noir/ Joan Watch: Female on the Beach (1955)

Watched:  09/18/2024

Format:  Criterion

Viewing:  First

Director:  Joseph Pevney

Y'all know I'm all in for Joan Crawford, and I think Jamie's a fan, too.  So, we put this one on from Criterion.  

There have to be papers written about Joan in this era and who her movies were aimed at.  She'd been kicking around since the Silent Era, was a huge star for a spell in the 1930's, then lost her box office mojo and was declared "box office poison", then had a massive come back in the mid-1940's with Mildred Pierce (recommended).  She came back around aged 39 - something to cheer for.  And she really is great in that movie.  And then she enjoyed real work for some time - including into 1955, when this movie came out.

I am sure there was an audience that knew and loved her from their youth and identified with her as they aged.  Further, she kept managing to play the very-much-desired woman here at age 49, when Hollywood still thought once you hit 28, you might as well be a grandma in movies.  But women attend movies, and I suspect - based on the female-forward stories (but still very much of the politics of the 1950's) - that her audience were women, and these thrillers served that loyal fanbase.

Age is but a number,* but - I will be honest here - Joan's hard-living and some bad choices in styling and make-up caught up with her around this time, and the adoration characters heap on her seems a bit of a stretch.  But I suspect Joan's audience didn't care.  Aging on screen and still being desirable was part of what she was selling.  She's still reminding people she can wear shorts on screen and get away with it.

Crawford received an Oscar nomination for Sudden Fear in 1952, and I suspect this movie was meant to recover some of that glory - but there's also echoes of other films.  What would become the Lifetime Movies formula for a while was being sorted out here.  Strong women fall for the wrong guy, and now their life is in danger from him or because of him (Sudden Fear is pretty good, gang).

This is more of that, in it's way.  In theory Female on the Beach (1955) is based on a(n unproduced) stage play.  It's about a widow who inherits a house, is planning to sell it, but stays and gets romantically involved with cipher-ish character "Drummy" (Jeff Chandler), who bobs along with the plot, morphing into whatever need to be played next, his motivations and character malleable to the text.  He's the puppet for a couple next door, who know they can use him to take money from widows?  (it makes no practical sense, but it's the set-up.)  

The movie never really feels like anything makes sense or is buyable.  It starts by supposing a 120 pound women ran through a railing, cracking what seems to be a 2x6 with her body and momentum running five feet, and... no.  Then the realtor tries to hide this happened the day before as the cops are literally right there.  And that Joan wouldn't call the cops on Drummy as a sex-pest within five minutes of meeting him seems impossible.  

Jan Sterling plays an ex of our male lead, and very recognizable character actors Cecil Kellaway and Natalie Schafer (Mrs. Howell!) the couple manipulating the situation.  Charles Drake plays a police detective who's beat is beach?

What does work in the movie is that Joan is on fire.  Is this movie a camp classic?  It could be.  It maybe should be?  Joan is given innumerable great lines and moments in this movie, and even when you're mad at Universal for letting her hair-style be... not good, you can't help but admire what feels like Joan dropping zinger after zinger.    

SPOILERS

There's something to be said about making the villain the seemingly foolish, very platinum blonde Jan Sterling character  - not quite Monroe, but nodding that way.  She's the hot young thing in the movie (33 or so at time of filming to Joan's 49), but we set Joan up as the one Jeff Chandler goes all in for, which makes sense - Joan is not batshit in this movie.  If you're considering that pro-Joan audience, having someone who reflected the "ideal female" on 1955 as a looney killer probably felt good.  But considering the why's and how's of this plot definitely made me think "who is the movie for?"  Thus, the point of this post.

The politics in it are awful.  As Jamie warned way in advance "She better not get with him after that!" as Chandler terrifies and threatens violence upon Joan.  Fam, you know she does.  But so... obvious, Jamie was calling it out as a trope well in advance.

Anyway - the movie was okay.  By far not my favorite.  But it would be fun to watch with folks and root for Joan.

*we at The Signal Watch do not think foxiness ends at some specific age, and you're a weirdo if you think otherwise    Please see photos of Hannah Waddingham in late 2024 for evidence that 50 is a perfectly hot age to be